It's not maintenance time yet so I WILL STOP treating myself!

I've been staying around the same weight for a month now since I recovered from the "too tight" epsiode over Easter - but as you will see, I shouldn't be surprised there has been no movement on the scales. I am pretty pleased with my overall efforts since surgery so far and have been enjoying all the positive comments from friends and acquaintances (a family friend told me last night I was looking 'skinny' - frankly I think that is taking it a bit far but it still felt good!) - so much so that I have been rewarding myself and allowing myself some extra treats every day - a bit of chocolate here, an ice cream there and an extra few slices of cheese thrown in as well. It has not got out of control and reached the weight gain stage and as Maree says it is showing me just what I will be able to do when I reach my goal and I am ready to "maintain" a healthy weight. But - right now I need to stop the extras and get back to my loss regime - I still have a way to go yet!

As I said last time I have been travelling for work a lot lately and I know I need to watch the food extras that come with that... airline meals - eaten from boredom not hunger, dessert with a work dinner, extra glasses of wine etc etc. So I am home all week this week and I have taken control again... and I've manged a few more trips to the gym as well. I'm feeling much better for it and have finally seen a very small downward movement on the scale - long may it last!

Thanks for following us on this voyage of discovery... Discovering what really makes me eat, as well as discovering my inner thin person! Great to see all of your comments, posts and progress as well... for those of you who have been "with the band" for longer than us, I would imgaine that this "extra treats" stage is not new to you... For those still to get this far - beware the little extras which will slow you down. For now - I'll keep the food treats to once a week rather than once a day!

BYOC questions

Saw these on Drazil's blog (and now see they're on others too) so here goes:

1. Name a career you would NOT want to do and tell why.

Vet or vet nurse - I know everyone should love small fluffy animals but I just don't get it and this would be a nightmare job to me (I would love to be a doctor for people though and actually think I am medically trained because I've watched every episode of ER).


2. What’s the best present you ever received for your birthday?

A red ten speed bike for my 13th birthday. My parents had warned me the week before that I wouldn't be getting a bike as it was too expensive but on the day there it was - I was beside myself with excitement and can still remember the moment of the reveal.

3. What do you hide behind?

Hmmm, I've always been a confident person but if anything I'd say humour ("umour" for the Oz and NZ Kath and Kim fans). Better to make a joke first before anyone else can.

4. Where were you born?

New Plymouth, New Zealand.

5. A little twist on this one..usually we ask – what blog spoke to you the most, stuck with you, had the most effect on you this week? This week I’m adding to that which comment may have affected you greatly? Sometimes a blog can lead to amazing comments and they deserve their own claim to fame here in this question.

I can't pinpont one comment - but I'm always happy when there are comments here - shows that someone is reading!

New readers and yet another fill

I see we now have 33 followers! It's nice to know there are some real people out there in blogland. If you have a blog I've added myself as a follower - if I've missed you please leave your blog address in a comment so I can take a look.

I went for ANOTHER fill today - I feel like I'm getting close to the sweet spot/green zone/nirvana - whatever you want to call it! .2mls for a total of 6.8 mls now. Definitely able to eat less before I get the "you're full" messages. Slider foods of course are no problem at all and willpower needs to be called on for that! For me slider foods are biscuits (cookies in the US), potato chips, crackers and chocolate - all the good stuff! I try to allow myself a little of those foods every now and then so I don't start obsessing. The scale has started moving again (slowly) so that makes me happier.

Friday afternoon here - yay! Off to see Miss Saigon with a friend tonight which I'm looking forward to. I've seen it a few times and love the show, although I always find the ending heartwrenching. Happy weekend everybody.

Collarbone

I was just sitting on the couch watching TV (as I love to do in the evening when the kids are in bed and all is quiet) and I reached up to touch my chin for some reason and my hand was snagged by my incredible sticking out collarbone! I am not exaggerating (would I? moi?!). Okay so maybe not snagged but definitely a sticking out collarbone and when I hunch my shoulder forward a bit it really really sticks out and then I can feel the whole collarbone and it's not very big and how does it not break?!!! aarrrggghgh - anyway that is my small collarbone sticking out freaking out moment. Thank you for reading my rant. I'm sure there will be more such sticking out bone moments as this weight loss continues...I'm sure you can't wait!

Crowning glory

Isn't that what hair is supposed to be? I've always been fond of my hair - it's thick and wavy and shines. But it's falling out! Arggggh! When will it stop? Every morning I have to clear our my hair brush and put a big clump of hair in the rubbish bin. And washing it?!! Hair everywhere! I'm glad I have lots of hair or I would worry about going bald. But when will it stop? I lost some hair after I had my girls - but not this much! I was going to take a photo of the morning hair loss but then I thought that was gross! So you are spared the hairball picture.

Busy Busy Busy

Life and work have been crazy busy the last couple of weeks - haven't had a chance to ride my bike, go to the gym much, catch up with friends or write a blog! Last week I had was working in Sydney, then back in NZ in Auckland and Hamilton all in 4 days and tomorrow I am off to Melbourne for most of the week. For anyone who travels for their work they will agree with me that the travel always sounds much more fun than it actually is!
I am managing much better since since my band overfill drama at Easter - not too hungry now and eating reasonable meals and having small losses. I still need to learn that my stomach is not as big as my mind thinks and to not overdo the portions I serve myself... and to stop as soon as I feel I have had enough. Sometimes that last mouthful (cos it really tastes good..) can make me feel really uncomfortable for 15 mins or so.
I have started to have lots of comments about my weight from all sorts of friends and acquaintances in the last couple of weeks... Most say "you look great, how have you done it" - and I mostly say "eating much less!" - which is true. But I am feeling more able to talk about my band now that I know it is working and I have actually told quite a few people about it - especially those who struggle with their own weight. It will be interesting to see the reaction from my work colleagues in Melbourne this week... most I haven't seen for a year or so. Will keep you posted.

Spooky!

I just noticed that Jenny and I both have 11.1 kg to go to goal! How random is that? And how long will it take us? Since my first big two months I've lost slowly at an average of about 2 kilos a month - I would love it to be quicker but at that rate I'll be at goal in about 5 months so abut 10 months post-surgery which would be great by me. I would then weight what I did when I was 17!!! Seems possible now.

Saturday morning

A beautiful autumn Saturday and I'm up doing housework - washing etc - before getting out and about with my girls (that sounds strange, I do mean my actual female children, not my "girls" - they're always with me!). Had another fill yesterday - .4ml for a total of 6.6mls. And a small loss today for a new low so I'm feeling good. My back is improving slowly and I'm keeping on moving. Really not much else to report - I'm enjoying reading everyone else's blogs and love any comments you leave here. Hope everyone has a great weekend!

I will go to the gym. I will go to the gym. I will...

You get the idea. I went to a pump class on Monday - first time at the gym for ages and I enjoyed it. Tried not to go too hard but I have been a bit sore - am planning another class tomorrow but last night I hurt my back carrying a big box of books into my book group - stupid. I hope I feel okay tomorrow as I want to keep on with this gym thing. Once I get back into the routine I'm great at going to the gym, but it's always hard to get started again. I've taken some voltaren left over from after surgery and am trying to keep moving gently.

Anyhow, apart from that I have had a blah eating week - needing bigger meals to feel full and definitely keen on a fill when I see the nurse tomorrow. I'd like to try a .5 ml and see how I go - although I want to avoid Jenny's tight experience. But I do live and work about 5 minutes walk from the doctor's office so not a big deal if I need to go back in. We shall see...

New photo and back from Easter holiday

Finally Jenny and I managed to get a new photo together showing our new post-op-but-still-in-progress photo! Here is the old one taken a few weeks before surgery:



I can definitely see a big difference. And I feel different too. This week we've been on holiday with the kids and it felt good to be in togs at the swimming pool and feel like I'm on my way to slim - and dragging 17 kilos less out of the pool is great, too! I went on a hydroslide for the first time - not that weight had stopped me doing that before - just nerves - but I LOVED it -can't believe I wanted until I was 40 to do something so fun. We had a great holiday in Taupo (geothermal area for those not in NZ). Here I am at the Huka Falls (it was cold - hence the hat!):





Back to work tomorrow - yuck! But also an opportunity to get back to the gym...think I need to ramp up the exercise to keep this weight loss moving and stay toned. Hope everyone is doing well.

Tight - Oh so Tight!

I had a .5ml fill on Thursday before Easter taking me to 6ml in my 10ml band.... and it had been 5 weeks since my last fill. The glass of water at the doctors rooms went down fine and so did coffee, and crackers and cheese later that evening and I wasn't hungry... so I was pretty happy. BUT - the next morning was a different story. My band was so tight... I could not even get a cup of coffee down before it went cold. At first I thought it was just the "tight in the morning" issue but as the day went on it didn't get any better. Everything was a struggle - a glass of water took an hour to pass through my band... with plenty of weird gurgling noises accompanying this. I spent most of the Easter weekend struggling to swallow enough fluid to keep hydrated and some protein shakes to get some nutrition in. Had several bouts of near vomiting and lots of regurgitation - was very unpleasant and uncomfortable!! Not even chocolate or ice cream seemed to want to go down - so I knew things were not right!

I did contemplate trying to get a local doctor or nurse to remove some of the fill over the weekend but noone here in my hometown has the knowledge and as I was managing to keep hydrated I hung on until after Easter. I did have a non-cored needle and I used to be a nurse and I seriously considered doing the deed myself... I was pretty desperate! Luckily sanity prevailed and I waited for the experts to save me! The clinic receptionist was fantastic yesterday when I rang with my sorry story, I did a mercy flight to the big city and she hastily arranged for the doctor to come in and sort me out...! I had .3 of the fill removed and felt an instant relief and then snacked on her lunch crackers, water and juice - Big thanks to the clinic angel! It's amazing how such a small amount can make such a difference.

What have I learnt from all this....
1. I now only need a very small amount to make a difference - might be .1ml fills for me from now on
2. You can feel fine straight after a fill but be too tight the next day... weird but true. I might stay overnight in the big city next time I have a fill - just in case
3. You can lose 3.5kgs in 4 days if you only manage to swallow 1 optifast shake in a day - I am fully expecting to gain a fair bit of this back in the next fews days as I make up for lost time
4. I did not eat (well did not keep down) any hot cross buns or chocolate this easter and the world did not end!

Easter eggs are a slider food

Easter Sunday and I am chocolated out - have had half a medium sized egg and about 8 belgian praline chocolates and I don't want any more (well now yet anyway!!!). I had planned to eat some chocolate today so I feel fine about the chocolate consumption. My theory is that it's better to eat it all on one day and be done with it than spread the evil chocolate over a week.

We're having a relaxing Easter break - have seen lots of family friends and had some nice "you're looking good" comments but I am wondering how much to tell when (if) people ask how I've done it. So far I say "eating less" and move on - but I do feel a little guilty that I'm not telling the whole truth. Hmmm....

Jenny and I are still to get a decent photo for this blog - but we are going to replace the current one where we are pre-op and less than gorgeous.